Career

circle of life

Do you jump out of bed every day because you are excited about your work?

Me neither.

I LOVE my work!  Both massage and coaching are true passions of mine and I couldn’t imagine a life where I didn’t do them.  I’m very lucky to have found a paying job doing what I love.  I didn’t realize that doesn’t happen very often.  So this section can be hard to rate.  Some people feel as long as they don’t hate their job and it provides enough for them to live off of that they rate it a 10.  :-/  Really?  That’s the best you can do for this life?  Work a job you don’t hate making enough to survive?  Really?

So let’s strip away the layers and determine what a 10 in Career would look like.

The easiest question to answer is: Do you hate your job?  If it’s a no, great!  Keep going, if you do hate your job, well, then you know your rating is going to be low and do you really need to evaluate anything else?  Does anything else matter if you dread going into work every day, you come home frustrated and depleted every day?  Is just paying your bills really enough to keep doing what you’re doing?

Next question: Do you like your job?  Yes?  Great!  How much?  What do you like about it specifically?  Now, do you love your job?  If this is a no but you still like your job, you can keep evaluating because a perspective shift may be all that’s needed to change like to love.

Does your job cover your basic expenses?  In other words, are you making enough to make ends meet?  If you find that you are consistently going further and further into debt you need to determine if that’s your spending habits or if you really aren’t making enough.  Ideally, how much money do you want to make a year?  Is this possible at your current job?

Now the $1,000 question: Does your job serve your life purpose?

Wait, what?

What does my career have to do with my life’s purpose?

Really?…  I mean, REALLY?!  You don’t see a connection?  Or maybe you do but you don’t see any feasible way of earning money playing video games… (you can btw).  Is playing video games really your life purpose?  I’m guessing not.  If you aren’t like me and you haven’t spent years working on personal development to find your inner light and figure out what sparks it, then you probably are about ready to tune out this particular blog.  Let me urge you to keep reading though.

Here are three articles that I think will give you a good stepping stone to figuring out something: 1 2   I particularly like #3 but it’s more my style.

My life purpose is to serve.  Not like a slave or a waitress.  I serve to inspire, to motivate, to guide, and to help.  My Love Language is Acts of Service as well.  So, this is how I feel loved (when the serving is reciprocated).  Not everyone’s purpose will line up with their Love Language, I just thought it was neat that mine does.

Your purpose will change and mature over time.  Things will become more clear, your particular “path” (if you will) will be easier to stay on with a greater understanding of living your life’s purpose.  This isn’t a spiritual thing for everyone.  I know plenty of secular people who still feel like they are “really good” at something and that’s their life’s purpose.

Once you understand what you’re really good at, what your passion is, and what your purpose is, evaluate your career and determine if it’s inline with that.  You might be surprised.  Sometimes during this enlightening research and evaluation you begin to see your job in a new light and can approach your job in a new way that gives it more meaning to you and turns “I like my job” into “I love my job”.  Sometimes you realize it’s no where near where you should be and it’s time to find something new.  (which is when having a coach is handy)

purposegraphic

There really is a way to find a paying job doing something that serves your passion, makes you enough money, and makes this world a brighter, shinier place for you!

Circle of Life     Spirituality     Relationships     Career     Education     Finances     Nutrition

Physical Activity     Social Life     Home Environment     Creativity     Health     Joy

Creativity

circle of life

What does Creativity mean to you?  Do you imagine being able to draw, or create things, or arts and crafts?  What if you are the “arts and crafts” type?  Does that mean you don’t have any creativity?  Oh, how will you ever get a balance life if you can’t be crafty?!

Fear not!  Creativity has nothing to do with being artsy and crafty!  Well, it can, if that’s how you express yourself.  Creativity is your ability to confidently and effective express yourself in the things that you do.  When someone looks at something you’ve done (a project, a meal cooked, a household chore completed) there should be little clues that YOU did it.  Sometimes it’s only the people who really know us well that can pick up on them, and other times someone who’s just heard of you could be like, “Oh, right, Kimberley totally did THAT!”

So how do you gauge this section?  This is apart of your creativity as well.  Think about all the things you do on a daily basis.  How much of them have you tweaked or altered to fit your style and your needs?  Now think about how you felt when you tweaked them.  Did it make you uncomfortable?  Empowered? Apathetic?  Do you celebrate how you do things differently or do you try to hide it away so you seem more sheeple ish?

There’s one more things I’d like you to consider: how do you express your joy?  Creativity can be expressed in all areas of our lives, but I feel it’s most important in expressing our Joy!  When you are excited, happy, vibrant, full of life and energy, proud, etc how do you express it?  Are you confident in sharing those amazing emotions with others?  Do you feel like it makes others feel inferior or do you think it empowers them to express their own joy?  Think of that for a while if you feel the need to hide when you’re very excited about something.  Why?  Are the people you surround yourself with allowing you to express your creativity and encouraging you to live a better and better life?  Or do you feel like there’s jealousy, envy, and maybe frustration and anger towards your success?

Creativity is a neat section because once you understand how you can utilize it in your life it starts to feel almost like a game to incorporate it into the things you have to do that may not feel like fun.  If you feel like your creativity is blocked, you just don’t know where to go with it, feel free to message me and set up a time to do your free one hour Health Coaching session!

Circle of Life     Spirituality     Relationships     Career     Education     Finances     Nutrition

Physical Activity     Social Life     Home Environment     Creativity     Health     Joy

Physical Activity

circle of life

This section covers more than just “do you exercise”.  Why is it important though?  Beyond the obvious, we’re meant to move because we’re not plants theory, what does being physically active really do for us?

Looking at the body you’ll see it needs to move.  If we don’t move enough our joints become rigid and ache, our muscles begin tightening up and atrophy, our connective tissue firms up and restricts movement more, our lymph fluid stops flowing and creates edema and a toxic environment, our blood begins to pool in our veins, and the list honestly keeps going when you start looking at secondary effects to our cells and our organs and other systems.

Emotionally and mentally many people will suffer from foggy brains, depression, apathy, anger, feelings of being overwhelmed, and more just from not moving enough.

A major problem with all these side effects is a body in motion remains in motion… and a body at rest remains at rest unless acted upon by another force.  That force is your mind.  Once we become sedentary it becomes increasingly harder and harder to start moving more.  Our body aches, our mind loses motivation, we just can’t imagine getting up and doing something.

So, when evaluating this section there are several things you need to take into consideration.  Look at your every day normal physical activity.  Do you have a sedentary job?  Do you park close or a little further away?  Do you take the stairs or elevator?  Do you drive everywhere or will you walk if it’s close enough?  Then, look at what you do extra for activity.  Do you have a regular workout program?  Do you go for walks?  Do any of your hobbies or recreations involve physical activities?  If you use a step counter do you at least hit 10,000 a day?  Next, how do you feel when you move?  Is your body in pain (for no other specific reason)? Do you feel stiff or are you sluggish to get moving?  Do you get tired quickly?  Is it a big mental strain to be active?  How well do you recover after physical activity?

If this is a section you struggle with message me to set up your free Health Coaching appointment.

Circle of Life     Spirituality     Relationships     Career     Education     Finances     Nutrition

Physical Activity     Social Life     Home Environment     Creativity     Health     Joy

Social Life

circle of life

While getting a good rating in social life would seem like it would take you partying and going out all the time, that is fairly far from the truth.  Before we get into the “what” of Social Life, let’s address the “why”.  If you don’t understand why this is important you won’t be able to rate it accurately.

Being social has to do with how you interact with other people.  Humans by nature crave social contact (physical, mental, and emotional).  The human body fails to thrive without an appropriate amount.  What this means is that without an appropriate amount of social contact your body will stop functioning properly.  Your mind will struggle.  Your emotions will become unstable.  Thankfully, being social doesn’t mean you have to be an extrovert or that you even have to go out to big events.

So what is being social?  It’s the ability to connect with others on some level.  It means that you feel camaraderie with your co-workers.  You are able to do simple small talk with strangers while standing in line.  You have people who you feel confident you can be vulnerable with and it would be ok.  It doesn’t have to be a bunch of people and you don’t have to be the kind of person who goes out of their way to talk with everyone around them.  You should feel fairly comfortable, though, being around people (even if it’s just one or two at a time) and find joy spending time with people you care about.

Think about your ideal amount of “people” time.  How often would you like to socially hang out with people you care about?  How well do you communicate with others vs how well would you like to?  Think about what kind of social life would recharge your batteries, make you feel connected, and bring joy to your life.  Then rate where you are at today!

Circle of Life     Spirituality     Relationships     Career     Education     Finances     Nutrition

Physical Activity     Social Life     Home Environment     Creativity     Health     Joy

Health

circle of life

After you read this sentence I want you to close your eyes and see how you feel; check in with your emotions, how is your mental state, what does your body feel like?

That’s your health.  It’s not some magical number on a scale or being in the “normal” range on all your lab work.  It’s not how few sick days you’ve taken, or how well you can work through feeling crappy.  Your health is about how you feel.

Obviously your doctor for the most part would disagree with me, and that’s ok.  When you’re with your doctor, talk about the other kind of health, when you’re with me, tell me how you feel.

All those numbers and tests are gauges to your health, though.  It’s true if your numbers are in line most of the time you’re going to feel healthy.  Not always though.  Since I’m a believer that life is meant to be lived and experienced and I feel like you can only really do that with your full heart if you feel healthy, then that’s what we’re going to talk about.

So what would be a 10 in health?  What quality of sleep do you want to get?  How energized throughout the day do you want to be?  How do you want your body to feel?  What is the best form of mental being you can be?  Do you feel your emotions, respond appropriately, and accept them for what they are?  (Emotions are important and should never be stuffed!)

Being healthy isn’t about always being happy.  It’s about having the ability to experience life fully without restrictions from your mind, emotional state, or body.  If you don’t allow yourself to fully feel your anger then you can’t process and work through situations and will get stuck in relationships.  If you don’t nourish your body properly it won’t function properly and you’ll not be able to perform tasks to get you through the day.  Without a good amount of sunlight, proper nutrition, hydration, and physical activity your mind will get sluggish or foggy and keep you from reaching your potential.

Your state of being healthy will be different from everyone else’s.  If you’re a diabetic it doesn’t discount you from reaching a 10 in this section.  As long as you take care of your situation and it only limits you the way it’s expected to limit you, then you’re golden.  If you have a mental disorder, we’ll take mine for example, I have Borderline Personality Disorder.  There are days (sometimes weeks and months) where I suffer anxiety, depression, withdraw, etc and I don’t feel well.  I would look at how am I treating myself?  Typically my symptoms are very manageable as long as I’m taking care of myself and doing the extra things that need to be done to manage my condition.  When I slip into a spot where my “normal” functioning isn’t optimal, I have to evaluate my health (how I feel) and determine what I’m not doing.  Sometimes, it’s just my BPD and I keep working through it.  My 10 varies from day to day on what’s included in it based off of what is possible for me to attain for that day.

Determine your 10 and figure out where you are today, right now.  This is a section that can evaluated frequently and works well with a personal journal.

Please message me with any questions if you are stuck in figuring out your special circumstances.  I’d be happy help.

Circle of Life     Spirituality     Relationships     Career     Education     Finances     Nutrition

Physical Activity     Social Life     Home Environment     Creativity     Health     Joy

Finances

circle of life

Let’s take a look at your money situation.  No, stay with me, it’s not going to be that bad.

Just like the other sections in the Circle of Life, we have to figure out where you are and where you want to go.  Finances can be a trigger for some very negative emotions for most people.  Marriages can end over finances.  People have taken their lives over their financial state.  This is probably, to me at least, the most serious of sections; however, it doesn’t have to be.  Taking control of your finances can be the most empowering thing you’ve ever done.  Short of winning the lottery, there is no quick way about it though.

To get a good understanding of where you’re at it’s best to get your credit report and pull at least three months of bank statements.  In the credit report link there is lots of information about how to read your report and what to look for.  If you still don’t understand what you’re looking at try here.  You really need a good understanding how how your credit report works, what negatively and positively affects it, and how to make the best and quickest impact on your score.

Then look at your three months of bank statements.  Make a list of all your bills that come out monthly and weekly, what date, and for exactly how much.  After that make sure you list anything that comes out quarterly and annually as well and anything else that might not be so regular.  Next add to your list the other things you spend money on: food, clothes, entertainment, gas, miscellaneous stuff.  Use your bank statements to jog your memory and to get an accurate look at how much you actually spend each month in those categories.

Lastly, tally up all of your monthly income and compare it to your expenses (not your debt yet).  How are you sitting?  Many people will realize that they are either spending more than they earn or that they are close to that.  It’s a scary sight to see it in black and white but in this case, knowledge is power and the more power you have in regards to your finances, the better.  If you fall into this category, it’s time to figure out where you can make cuts.  No matter where you are it’s important to stay on top of your finances and always be tweaking them to improve your situation.  If you get to the point where you have decent money left over, then you should start working on a plan to pay down your debt if you have it.

Now, I’m not a financial adviser (obviously).  If at any point you feel like you can’t do this on your own or that you have no way out of a negative spiral with your finances, get help from a professional right away.  Don’t wait, it doesn’t get better.  Bills don’t magically get paid, you most likely aren’t going to win or inherit a ton of money, and the longer you wait the more interest and late fees you’ll rack up.  Take the step now to correct the issues you have with your finances.  Focus on this until you have control over them and you see a light at the end of the tunnel and then always revisit them monthly to make sure you’re still going in the right direction.

Now you have a picture of where you’re at.  Where do you want to be?  Really?  If you tell the Universe that you’d like to have just enough to survive, that’s exactly what you’re going to get.  Your subconscious mind will work for exactly what you ask for.  I heard that money can’t buy happiness after you reach about $75,000 a year.  (That’s a Huffington Post link btw, cute article.)  So that’s my goal, why make more money than will make me happy?  172435-Happiness-Is-An-Inside-Job

Oh, right… Money can’t make you happy.  Well, that’s still my goal.  I don’t want to be rich but I don’t want to struggle.  I’ll be honest, I’m only about half way there, but I’m working my way up and I will get there!

Visualize what it will feel like to be a #10 with your finances.  Write down, in detail, what that entails for you.  How good will it feel to have all your bills paid on time without stress?  Or when you have a sudden expense, you don’t have to worry because you have a savings fund for that and you’ll be good.  You have to know in every fiber of your being that this is 100% possible.  For.  Everyone.  Yes, even that person you just conjured up in your head to prove me wrong, that person can reach his/her level 10 as well.  Remember, everyone’s 10 will be different.

Now, honestly rate yourself.  Where are you sitting completely with your finances?  Normally during a coaching session I would have someone work through all the sections of their Circle of Life before making goals and prioritizing everything and setting up an action plan; however, finances have an impact on every other section here.  So, if you are feeling motivated, are on a roll, and want to start making progress here, go for it.  Do it.  Take those steps.  But stay with me for the rest of the Circle.  We still have several sections to get through.

Circle of Life     Spirituality     Relationships     Career     Education     Finances     Nutrition

Physical Activity     Social Life     Home Environment     Creativity     Health     Joy

Home Environment

circle of life

Home is where the heart is.

Home is where you hang your hat.

Home sweet home.

There’s no place like home.

How do you feel about your home?

Try something.  The next time you’re going to be heading out for several hours leave a pen and paper by the front door.  When you walk in stop a moment.  Close your eyes and smell the air.  What does your home smell like?  Is it pleasing?  What do you hear when you walk in?  Are there dogs barking? Kids playing? The hum of the AC?  What do you see?  Is it clean?  Is there clutter?  Do you have things that show the love in your home easily in view?  How do you feel?  Is your home inviting?  Does it make you feel relaxed?  Is it your sanctuary?  Write all that you discover down.  On the other side of the paper, write what you want your home to feel like.  What sensations do you want to experience when you walk in the door?  How do you want others to see your home?  What impressions do you want your home to give?  Make sure that these ideas are inline with functionality.  I have 4 kids and I’m very happy with my home looking lived in and I have dogs and cats and I’ve accepted that unless I want to mask it with artificial smells, my home is going to have a “unique” smell.  What’s important to me is that things don’t look cluttered or dingy and that my home has a relaxing feel.  I want to come home, take a deep breath, and let everything go for the day.  You may have completely different ideas for your home.

Once you know where you’re at and where you want to be, rate it.  10 being you love your home exactly the way it is.  1 being there’s almost nothing you love about your home.  I’ll be honest, I was a 2 or 3 before I moved recently and it was horrible.  I never cooked, never had people over, I hated being home.  It weighed on me heavily and literally added to my weight.  Your home is very important, do not overlook this simple and often abused area of your life.

Circle of Life     Spirituality     Relationships     Career     Education     Finances     Nutrition

Physical Activity     Social Life     Home Environment     Creativity     Health     Joy